Is your child special?

By Bridget Nyamushagi

The answer to this question is of course. Definitely! What sort of mother would I be if I couldn’t admit that my child is special? However it all gets a bit confusing when school starts and then all these rules set in and conformity becomes the order of the day.

This is not to say that children be allowed to be unruly and disorderly in pursuit of finding themselves. Though as parents we have the responsibility to understand what’s unique about each child to be able to get through to them and have a more fulfilled relationship. Every child is born with something that they’re about and that sense of uniqueness is profound at the age of 8 to 9 years when they slowly start to have a mind of their own. You can call this the beginnings of genius. If kindled can lead to mastery, and many a loving memories, however if shunned will waver leaving your child to be just another kid in the school system.

   So what makes the leaders? What makes some kids stand out? Genius is that thing which has unfortunately has come to be associated a lot with academic excellence but genius crosses all borders, it simply means someone’s ability to take something ordinary and do with it something that will translate to other people and even make their lives better. Art, sports, music I couldn’t begin to say how much these things make living worthwhile. These are channels through which the cultural dispersion of our back grounds are fed. They’re what make our nation unique.

These may all be things that are locked within your baby’s little heart so reach out and help them realize these dreams.

Take interest

Spending time with the children is the most valuable gift you can give them. Outside your very busy schedule, it means getting to know them and the things they gravitate towards. They may be young but when they talk about things they are into be keen.

There is a lot of growing happening while you are away at office. Have special family days set aside to just laugh, have a good time and open up.

Once your children feel that they’re interesting enough for you to know, it builds a block of self confidence in starting to trust that they’re interesting enough for the rest of the world to know. A child’s greatness starts at your points of contact every day.

Encourage them

Having noticed that youlittle girl is good at soccer. Think about adding more Saturdays for soccer practice, there is no such thing as inappropriate at that age children are not looking to do anything really notorious they just want to play. In case of competitions, remind them that you always have their backs and it isn’t much about the winning as it is that they enjoy themselves, this positive affirmation will ensure that your love for them is not depended on anything they do, and so trust grows.

 Appreciate what they bring

You know that feeling when you want someone to love you just for who you are nothing more? Your child needs that more than anything in this world, many people even in their later years are followed by traumas of past unacceptance. By other people, they can get over, but their parents that stays a while. So save your child a lifetime of hurt and regret. While a child seeks to be accepted by peers the person they are really seeking to please is you, so don’t be too hard on them.

Every child is unique, and it’s okay to have expectations that serve as a measure of progress. But most times if we stand out of the situation, these expectations are an imposition of what we would have wanted to do with our lives not what the child wants to do with theirs. So be honest and let the children live theirs.

If your child is not the stellar kid in class, do not kill his athletes’ dreams to over compensate. Instead give the child what he likes while helping him understand that school is important too, that way you strike a balance and you’ve better chances of the child listening to what is important to you simply because you listened to what was important to them.

Appreciation of your child goes a long way in building self-esteem, you wouldn’t believe.

 Be patient and take time to talk.

There are zillions of things that could happen in your day, but always remember where you stand with your child.

Their minds are vulnerable and innocent, all they seek is to know, so be very careful what you say or express to them. Avoid display of too many negative emotions, if you want happy children, make them happy and be happy around them.

If you’re not having a very good day, and someone does something wrong. Take deep breaths before you act and talk to the child calmly. Let him sit on your laps and try help him see why what he did isn’t right. Hug it out after.

But before all this, children usually have reasons for acting certain ways, listen to their side of the story to get the entire perspective of the story before you act.

This will ensure good behavior in future and mostly assure your child that they can trust you to listen to them in times of trouble as they grow.

 Impressions last a life time

If you want your child to be something, be unto your child that person you want them to be. Religion teaches us this. It’s easy to think the way you behave should have nothing to do with your children, but extensive research shows that a child’s character is built from the things they’re surrounded by and see in the early years of their life. So assesyourself, are you being fair in the moods and environments you are exposing your children to?

Kindness, laughter generosity and happiness are all infectious, always be aware of your emotions around the children.

Children who grow up in positive environments become the outstanding individuals of their generation. And this goes without saying, a child who knows they will always have their parents support has no reason not to see the world as his oyster.

There are of course exceptions to the rule, nothing is black or white, children from unsound homes can learn to build their own support systems and grow to be striking individuals. But as you read this article, you have the opportunity for empowerment, do not let it pass you by.

 Do not give up living for their sake

Sometimes as an adult, life can be so full of hitches, that you forget there are people looking up to you for inspiration, people who still have hope and believe in a world full of life and color that’s budding and blossoming, a world of endless possibilities. The state of mind your child is in is what we can hope makes the world a better place, there is nothing that can compare to the laughter of a child playing on a Sunday afternoon, no amount of money can buy that.

Some of nature’s gifts come at no cost at all, so do not be so quick to burst their bubbles after all they only get one childhood, make it worthwhile. Have the courage to stand out of your personal problems and accept to play with them and you will learn from them. There may be no such thing as magic in the adult world, go back to that place the children have it in them.

HAPPY PLAY TIME!