Humour

Acid-tongued! Karl Lagerfeld’s Meanest and Most Controversial Quotes

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Karl Lagerfeld, the famous Chanel designer, passed away today at the age of 85. Lagerfeld served as the creative director of Chanel for 36 years, defining the world of luxury fashion. He was as famous for his designs as his ‘acid-tongue’ which often got him in trouble. He spoke four languages and was thoroughly witty and cutting in all of them.

Here are some of his unforgettable quotes

Life is not a beauty contest, some [ugly people] are great. What I hate is nasty, ugly people… the worst is ugly, short men. Women can be short, but for men it is impossible. It is something that they will not forgive in life… they are mean and they want to kill you.

Princess Diana was pretty and she was sweet, but she was stupid.

I’m a kind of fashion nymphomaniac who never gets an orgasm.

No one wants to see curvy women on the runway.

Sweatpants are a sign of defeat. You lost control of your life so you bought some sweatpants.

Nobody does the job better than [The Queen] does. She is never ridiculous; she is flawless.

I don’t even think I’m that famous. Now, Choupette really is famous. She has become the most famous cat in the world. I even get propositioned by pet food companies and things like that, but it’s out of the question. I’m commercial. She’s not. She’s spoiled to death. Obviously.

On Choupette: Everybody is around for her, she is the centre of the house, of the universe. She sleeps next to my head. She eats on the table – she has flawless manners.

We created a product nobody needs, but people want. If you need an ugly old car, it can wait, but if you want a new fashion item, it cannot wait.

 I lost 200lbs to wear suits by Hedi Slimane.My only ambition in life … is to wear size 28 jeans

I get along with everyone except for men my age, who are bourgeois or retired or boring.

Normally, I don’t recommend me for wedding dresses – they all get a divorce.

If you throw money out of the window throw it out with joy. Don’t say: ‘one shouldn’t do that’ – that is bourgeois.

There is nothing worse than bringing up the ‘good old days.’ To me, that’s the ultimate acknowledgment of failure

On Selfies: They are this horrible thing where you are distorted. The chin is too big, the head is too small. No, this is electronic masturbation.

To think appearances don’t count these days is a lie: it lets you live in harmony with yourself.

Don’t dress to kill, dress to survive.

What I’ve done, Coco Chanel would never have done. She would have hated it.

Trendy is the last stage before tacky.

Never use the word ‘cheap’. Today everybody can look chic in inexpensive clothes (the rich buy them too). There is good clothing design on every level today. You can be the chicest thing in the world in a T-shirt and jeans – it’s up to you

If you’re that famous and you put all your jewellery on the internet then you go to a hotel where nobody can come near to the room. You cannot display your wealth and then be surprised that some people want to share it with you.

If I was a woman in Russia I would be a lesbian, as the men are very ugly. There are a few handsome ones, like Naomi Campbell’s boyfriend, but there you see the most beautiful women and the most horrible men.

Greece needs to work on a cleaner image. It’s a big problem, as they have this reputation of being so corrupt. You can’t be sure the money will go where it’s supposed to go. Nobody wants Greece to disappear, but they have really disgusting habits. Italy as well.

First of all, Tina Brown’s magazine is not doing well at all. She is dying. I’m sorry for Tina Brown, who was such a success at Vanity Fair, to go down with a s***ty little paper like this. I’m sorry.

On people who complain about thin models: ‘They are fat mummies sitting with their bags of crisps in front of the television, saying that thin models are ugly.’

On former friend and Chanel muse, Inès de la Fressange: ‘I wish her all the luck in the world, just so long as I don’t have to see her anymore or hear her spoken about.’

On pop star, Seal: ‘I am no dermatologist but I wouldn’t want his skin. Mine looks better than his. He is covered in craters.’

On Heidi Klum: ‘I don’t know Heidi Klum. She was never known in France. Claudia Schiffer also doesn’t know who she is.’

On fur: ‘It is farmers who are nice to the cows and the pigs and then kill them. It’s even more hypocritical than hunters. At least the hunters don’t flatter the animals….I don’t like that people butcher animals, but I don’t like them to butcher humans either, which is apparently very popular in the world.’

On the Queen: ‘She looks a little bit like her grandmother – a more smiley version. “In terms of what she wears, she’s come into herself a little bit more – whatever that is.’

On Michelle Obama: ‘I don’t understand the change of hair. I adore Madame Obama, I love her. But there is a news reader at LCI which has this haircut…Frankly, this doesn’t suit her. The fringe was a bad idea, it’s not good.’

Thething at the moment is Adele. She is a little too fat, but she has a beautiful face and a divine voice.’

On Lana del Rey: ‘Is she a construct with all her implants?’

I’ve always known that I was made to live this way, that I would be this sort of legend.

Rest in Peace Karl Lagerfeld

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